Then I read this book.
And then I decided.
I am going to quit eating sugar!
That's big. That's huge! That's even bigger and huger than when I quit smoking. At least when you quit smoking you can turn to sugar to help you through the withdrawal period. But this is like substituting one addiction with another isn't it?
I quit smoking - officially - on 16th June 2009, the day before lower back operation No.1 I had my last cigarette outside the entrance of the hospital, and made a promise not to smoke again. I didn't go cold turkey though. First I used nicotine gums and patches, then I read a book a friend bought for me. I was struggling. I can admit it now it was not easy. I had made the decision to quit smoking and loose weight while recovering from said lower back operation. I didn't have just one, I had three watermelons under one armpit and it was only a matter of time before all of them would fall and brake.
So my back broke, again, along with my stomach (not from the nicotine gum but from the huge amount of painkillers and other pills I was taking) and that's when I actually quit smoking. Mentally that is. The physical act of lighting up never happened again since that day in June, but in some dark corner of my mind the hope that I will again feel the pleasure of this addiction, was silently burning. It was put out quite unceremoniously by the ICU doctor who said that if I smoked again my stomach will be completely ruined.
I've been nicotine free since September 17th 2009 and even though I catch myself thinking about cigarettes once in a while, the thought does not last for more that 1 second. I just dismiss it and move on.
I want to do the same thing with sugar. I want to look at the cupcakes, frosted cakes, cookies and cheesecakes and see through them, bypass them and expel them altogether from my conscious and unconscious mind.
It is going to be my biggest challenge so far.... and it starts tomorrow!
